Monday, May 12, 2008

Who am I?

I am struggling a bit with how to define myself these days. I am a working mom who doesn't go to work. I have no stories of endless meetings and office politics (although I do have vivid memories of them!) I have no commute. I have no co-workers.

I am a business-owner, but do not aspire to be a millionaire (I mean, if someone walks in here and hands me a million dollars I am certainly not saying no!) I am not trying to build an empire. Just an income.

I am a Mom and I stay at home, but I am not a stay-at-home-mom. I don't think I am brave enough for that world. I am about to embark on a summer adventure that will involve more quality time with my kids than ever before. Working at home, I can't justify sending them to a camp all day, so they will do a half-day camp and I am hopeful that I will be able to tear my attention away from my business (Stuff for Sprouts) at 12:30 every day until they are in bed and be a fun, patient mom. All my fingers are crossed over that one.

I spoke on the phone recently with a woman who started her own skin care line around the same time that I launched Stuff for Sprouts. And during this conversation, in which she was hugely nice and helpful and giving out good advice...I was struggling again. Because she has a whole company of people, 50 sales reps, a distributor, a deal with Babies R Us, and six kids. Yikes.

Oh yeah, and she launched her business at the same time she had her last baby...Left me feeling like quite the underachiever.

But, I remind myself...I don't want to be a mogul, just a mom, contributing to the income of the family, being around for the kids, playing with the dog, spending time with my husband. Juggling and balancing.

It is easier to figure out what you want than it it is to maintain that vision when you see what everyone else has. Like a 5-year-old with an ice cream cone (that is pretty flippin' delicious) who covets the super-astounding sundae that the kid at the next table has (which will probably result in an enormous belly-ache). I am learning to focus on the ice cream cone I've got. Even when it is dripping all over the floor. But sprinkles would sure be yummy!

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